Yesterday it rained 'til my levee broke,
went to the laundromat and didn't even smoke.
I'm living with a crazy goddamn feline,
it sleeps all day and tries to keep me up all night.
I think it's deranged because it stands guard over a dip in the floor,
and sometimes it gets the urge to do laps at three in the morning or four.
I'll wake up in shock and whisper/shout "Cat!",
and throw my flip-flop, if I was Dr. Dre it would be a ratatatat.
I won't let him sleep so he'll have to wait until later,
when I leave, but watch, tonight he'll spend an hour on top of the radiator.
Like I said he runs laps around my apartment, I've seen the track*,
Tonight I'll put a new obstacle up, it'll be my hand showing him what the five fingers said to the face. Slap!
* He starts in the middle of the room, then runs behind the couch, leaps on top of it from the floor, then under my bed, knocks over a plant, around my bed, sharpens his claws on the foot of the bed and my feet, and back to a crouched position near the dip in the floor.